Question Details: i just refused a bigger role my boss offered due to my lack of confidence. im also having trouble interacting with my bosses..im tired of just smiling at them and i feel left out when they chat. im also getting tired working after school...today i just barely greeted anyone...they must have thought me a snub. its barely a month that ive been working there. i wanna be really good. and i feel like i frustrated my boss who must have expected me to go all the way and all confident...what can i do to keep up and meet her expectations...i got praises before and i feel like im a frustration...=(Work problem..i need advice?
Try again.
Boss offered you a bigger role that you turned down d/t your lack of confidence. Feel like you frustrated the boss who thinks you are someone you aren't? Dont want to keep smiling instead of contributing to the conversation b/c you feel you have nothing interesting or useful to say? Or you dont want the temporary attention?
I'm betting you are a very nice person and maybe 1. are feeling temporarily overwhelmed by meeting so many people at once. 2. gave your best at the interview to get the job and feel like you dont measure up to the person you presented yourself as. 3. putting so much energy into thinking about the new job thats its hard to have energy for the job itself. 4. I would think that the other employees thought you not a snub but rather shy, or just in thought about something.
Dont be so hard on yourself. A new job takes time to settle into. Try to find one person you like that you can team up with. S/he can help bridge some of the gaps. Try to find something you particularly like enough about your job that you can look forward to going to work.
Dont be so hard on others-they probably think well of you. Dont be hard on yourself (its a bad habit to get into) And dont be a perfectionist if you tend to want to be. Its a place to fall from. Employee Assistance must keep all communication w the employees confidential. If your company has EA try talking to someone if you feel you can trust. Good Luck.Work problem..i need advice?
Speak up and be honest with your boss. She may understand more than you realize if you tell her you lack confidence. That's very common especially in young people. Don't sell yourself short. It takes time but you'll come out of your shell if you just keep making an effort.
I don't know if you were belittled a lot as a kid, but, if you were then it probably made you feel as though you could never measure up. It kinda makes a person dysfunctional because they sometimes feel that if they can't be perfect then they won't play. Another thing that damages a kid is if the parents would talk nice in front of a person and then talk ugly about them behind their back. The kids subconsciously see their parents as liars and if the parent compliments them on something the kid won't believe it because they talked ugly about someone the kid liked. Man a livin' did I get off track or what lol. Just get in there and don't be so hard on yourself. God bless. Mmm
Sounds like your problem isn't so much in work, but in the personal realm. Without sounding like an armchair psychologist, you may have a little bit of depression going on. The thing you have to ask yourself is 'what is really wrong, and how can I fix it?' It could be something at home, or at school, or any number of places. Once you find the root of your problem, you can take all that energy you are using on it and focus it on your job. You may be surprised what will happen when you start refocusing your energy on things other than what is wrong! Keep your chin up and remember, Help is always there, you just have to ask for it sometimes.
Move on, you're not happy.
You need to take your boss aside and explain that you are still learning the ropes but that you want to and will do a good job, also tell her your having outside influences that are causing your slowness to take on more, i.e. problems with parents, sleeping habits, make something up. They will feel sorry for you and understand that your a good employee thaT just needs alittle time to ease into the new roles and tasks they are asking you to do.
So you feel left out when the bosses ';chat';. humm that's really too bad. Get over it, they will include you when you are a boss. Until then they are working on a need to know basis and you don't need to know. You have a lot to learn about how it works out in the business world. It was a good idea NOT to take that promotion. Sometimes bosses like to promote you ';up and out';. Continue on with this bottom of the barrel employee attitude and you will be working at Burger King...or not!
They probably are a disappointed that you dont see in yourself what they see in you. If you can take the new postion, you may like the change and the challenge. If not maybe it's time to move on.
you sound like you are physically rundown. maybe too much to do each day and the stress of maintaining an ';A'; game might be taking its toll. you probably are a frustration because it doesn't sound like your boss knows you are feeling tired, feel intimidated by additional responsibility, etc. have you ever been checked for chronic fatigue syndrome? what is your diet like? do you get regular exercise and fresh air? these are all questions that should have positive answers, but if you say these are problem areas, i think you may have the answer to your work problem. we all need appropriate work-life balance. look into ways to achieve balance and share your situation with your boss (but don't whine...)
Talk to them about it, and let them know that you frustrated. If they know they'll probably make things easier for you until you're back on your feet. Has worked for me.
Hope this helped.
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