Monday, August 23, 2010

I need some advice for this problem with my Boyfriend?

Okay so where should I start off . My boyfriend and I have been bestfriends for almost 2 years so far . He knows basially everything about me and all my little dark secrets . We just got together like 1 month ago though . Well anyways i have a problem, well DUH 'cause your reading this . Hahahs .








So anyway this is where the problem starts he just recently became real close to this one guy who now he calls his bestfriend . They have all classes together, like all the same things, %26amp; etc. They hang out basically EVERYDAY . School and even out of school ! I mean I get that it's his bestfriend and all but it's just like i'm the one feeling left out . Like you know how when a person hangs out with a couple they feel like the third wheel ? No not for me, whenever me, my boyfriend, and his bestfriend hang out i'm basically the third wheel 'cause they talk about things they know about and like there little insiders . I mean yeah i know, ';Bros before Hoes'; but this is really too much . I mean just recently when my boyfriend and i, just us, were hanging out he was saying ';I miss[his bestfriend]'; and like i was just quiet . And him %26amp; i just kept walking and he just said it again like ';Man, I really miss [his bestfriend] . And like in my head i'm like WTF, i know ! Who cares ! And other times he'd be like, ';Have you seen [his bestfriend]';, ';I hope [his bestfriend] is coming today';, and other things like that . Or he'll like tell me like a certain funny kind of have-to-be-there moment between them . It's just really irritating ! Is it just me thinking this is way out of line ? Or I shouldn't be worrying ?








%26amp; Now recently his bestfriend is trying to get with this girl . So his bestfriend is now just hanging with that girl and my boyfriend is somewhat alone . In my head i'm like ';HAHA, get a taste of your own medicine'; but like ugh, i have no clue . I would talk to him about it, but i mean i know he'll flip out . I mean who wouldn't if your girlfriend or boyfriend came out saying ';you hang with so and so too much'; . I am not a clingy, nagging, or whatever kind of girlfriend . I don't even show i'm mad when he does stuff like this, sometimes . But yeah, I never complain !








So yeaah, ADVICE is really really needed right now .


So please send something !








%26amp;P.S,


MY BOYFRIEND IS NOT GAY . SO DON'T EVEN THINK THAT . HAHA, WHENEVER I TOLD MY FRIENDS ABOUT IT THERE LIKE ';OMG THERE LIKE BOYFRIENDS'; . BUT NO ! I KNOW FOR A FACT MY BOYFRIEND IS NOT GAY, HE IS 100% STRAIGHT .I need some advice for this problem with my Boyfriend?
Well you could ignore it and hope that his bestfriend gets with that girl and then he would spend all his time with her then ud get your bf back but i'd suggest that you need to talk 2 your bf if you 2 are bestfriends he will understand what your saying, don't have a rant just ask if you and him can spend some time together, go bowling, cinema etc. If he doesn't understand then he's not worth being with sorry but i'm sure he will totally understand.


PS this happened with me and my bf when we 1st got together so I know how it feels just talk 2 him like i did and now weve been together 3 years. :) Good Luck Hun xI need some advice for this problem with my Boyfriend?
it'll probably just be a phase, i'd tell him how you feel though. if you dont tell him, he clearly wont know theres a problem. dont have a go at him, just say that you miss seeing him.
Hi,


One is definitely tempted tof believe that he is gay! However, you have dispelled that opinion. My candid advise is that you should have a candid heart-to-heart talk with him. He probably is unaware that he is hurting you. I hope you live happily ever after
Sounds to me like he needs to get his priorities straight. Your girl should always come first. Talk to him about it. If there's one thing that guys are terrible at, it's guessing what a girl is thinking. I would know.
Boys aint normally that way.I mean i too hav many guy frndz but they've never showed more interest in going out wid a guy than a gal.Now as u r saying he is not a gay,we'll hav 2 cut that option off.


It might be possible that your boyfrnd is sharing somthn ....somthng very secretive [relaed 2 boiz] 2 his frnd...n so has get along wid him more nicely...or maybe he is just tryna check you or somthng...or maybe he really takes that guy as his best frnd...


At this situation i think u must go upto him...n clear everything once and for all...its no use keeping everything 2 urself ...have d guts 2 speak up your mind.but watever u say,make it in the sweetest way possible...


u really need best wishes!!!


BEST OF LUCK!!!

Can anyone give advice on gynaelogical problem?

I had a miscarriage two years ago, it was incomplete but I didn't have a D%26amp;C they waited for the pregnancy levels to go down.





Since then I have been sick in all kinds of ways. My heartbeat is irregular and I can feel it in my neck all the time. I am vomitting often.





I was getting bleeding between periods and after sex but now I'm getting very very bad periods. I get a tearing pain rather than a cramping pain, and this time (this week) there is some tissue like when I was miscarrying as well as clotting.





I am seeing a gynae on monday but I'm not sure what is happening right now. They can't see on scans because my womb is tilted backwards but I have a bulky uterus lining. They saw bits of tissue when they scanned me internally but they never scanned again.





What could be wrong? I am getting quite unwell.Can anyone give advice on gynaelogical problem?
check for endometriosis or scarring of uterus! good luck : )
  • eyeshadow pencil
  • I need some advice, roommate/friends problem?

    This might be long, but I need some advice on what I should do with this situation.





    I've been letting my best friend's bf stay with me. I wanted to help him but now I think he is scum.





    A couple months ago he crashed my friends car (he had been drinking and has no license) She took the fall for it so now her insurance paid for his surgery, and his wages for missing work.





    He got in trouble for driving without a license earlier in the year, and for something else so he is trying to get house arrest for those things. (house arrest at my place) But now Idk if want him there. I didn't realize that he was going to get money for missing work, so before I didn't ask for rent or help with pud/internet, but now I know he has money, and I'm irritated that he didn't offer to give me some, especially since I hooked up home phone service for his house arrest monitor! (I normally just use my cell cause I didn't need an extra bill)





    Also his friend mentioned to me that he is addicted to pills, and because of his surgery hes been on pills for two month and now he doesn't have any so I think that's why he's had a piss poor attitude, I'm guessing withdrawals. Plus the other day he brought this total creeper up to my apartment with him! I told him if he was going to do that stuff that he needed to do it away from the apartment! I'm convinced that he is an addict and was buying pills.





    His terrible moods are whats pissing me off the most. He should be grateful. His *** should be in prison for all the **** hes done! But he has it the easiest, he gets an EBT card for food, he is getting paid without having to work, he got that surgery paid for, and he lives at my place for free.. I don't get how someone lives like that... I don't understand how he can mop around with this terrible attitude when his life is sooo easy! Pisses me off, and even more so because he is mean to my friend and I hate seeing her hurting. So yea.. now I don't what to do. :( If I decided to kick him out how should I go about it? I don't want to upset my friend by kicking her bf out.. Idk what I would say.





    Advice? Comments? Suggestions?I need some advice, roommate/friends problem?
    kick his *** out of your place and have your friend not pay is bills anymore. take him to court and sue him for all the damages and suffering he has ccause you!!I need some advice, roommate/friends problem?
    UHMM %26gt;_%26gt; u should be SERIOUSLY concerned about your valueables turning up missing. Personally I would suggest that you ask him to pay for that home service phone that he is using, and make rules like no company he has no right to bring creepy people over to your house when he doesnt pay bills there. And u should look into putting him out u should not t olerate an addict ion your house who has taken advantage of your friend and you. If u feel ackward telling him to leave *i can understand that* tell his girlfriend your friend to tell him to go orr u can pretend that u are struggling financially and u want to get a roomate which would be a very cute excuse to boot him out , and then later just be like you decide dnot to go through with getting a roommte lol
    Ok! Hi, My name is Stasia and I think that you should kick his bum a** out of your home, But first kill him with kindness ask him since he's staying here with you can he help around the house like pick up on some bills since your not living there alone you shouldn't be stuck wit all the bills..... If he doesn't want to do that then ask him if he can at least pay you weekly or monthly some rent to put towards the bills and rent and if he doesn't want to live by your rules ask the guy as nice as possible to leave your home, because he's making it harder for you to survive. Tell your best friend that you love her but you can't keep living like this and if she wants him not to leave than she has to clean up after him, have some money every month to contribute to the bills or something because no one can live any where for free.... I hope I helped you out a lil bit wit my advice see i'm rude so tried to put that the nicest way possible........ Good luck!!!!!!!!!!

    Help! i need advice with this problem

    last year my friend and i got into this mild fight. i heard from one of my other friends that she hated me so i just stopped talking to her all together. now since the new school year is coming and i got my schedule and shes in 5 of my classes, and shes the only person i no in those classes. idk if i should ignore her or try to become friends again and idk how she will react if i do go up to her. i just would like to see what other people would do in this situation... so please help!Help! i need advice with this problem
    ooh bummer.


    well do you know for a fact that she hates you? have you asked her why?


    what if your other friend was just lying to you? well cause that's what happened to me once, so yeah thats why i'm asking.





    just keep it as it is. if you want to talk to her then go ahead but if you feel like that's not a good idea then don't, keep your distance. just make other friends in the classroom.Help! i need advice with this problem
    talk to her like you forgot it happened. if she doesnt seem to catch on or still seems mad, you need to apologize. say someone told you that she hated you, and that it made you really mad. now you realize that you shouldnt have accepted the info secondhand, think the little fight was stupid, you acted like a jerk, and you are sorry. even if its not true, the apologize needs to sound sincere and not like its blaming her. after that, just be freindly to her, and hope that she forgives you. also, you should try to get to know some of the other people in your classes.
    Maybe she got over the fight, if I were you I'd probably try and talk to her. It's not like she'd scream at you in the middle of school. If she doesn't wanna talk just move forward because she isn't a real friend. There's plenty of other people who would talk to you.
    The way I see it you have two options. You can walk up to her and talk about the fight and how it wasn't a big deal and you feel that you both over reacted. Explain to her that you guys are in so many classes together it wouldn't make sense not to be friends again and maybe help each other out.





    The other option is to find some different friends in the classes and leave her alone.





    I would opt for option 1. :)
    You need to just play it by ear. Don't over think it. Isn't the main reason you go to school is to learn something? Go to your classes, do the work and talk to the other kids around you when you're finished.





    School is kinda weird. You can actually go through different friends every year. It's not a huge thing so don't blow it up to be. You'll be fine, it won't be the end of the world of you two don't get back to the way you were before. It really isn't. In school you'll end up changing friends like you do classes every day.





    If you want to be back friends with that girl then you need to talk to her and find out what it was that happened between you two and offer to rectify the situation. You will have to speak to her - there's no getting around that. A closed mouth doesn't get feed love.





    Best of luck.
    well try talking to the other ppl that are n your classes and mabye since she doesnt have anyone to talk to she will try talking to u! thats what i would do!

    Need some outside advice on marital problem involving in-law...?

    Without going into much detail, my husband's brother sexually molested me one night (obviously, against my will and to my great shock). It didn't progress too far, since I put an immediate stop to it, but I still have the lingering feelings of violation, shattered trust, fear, guilt, etc. I informed my husband immediately, who was obviously stunned, but admits he does believe me. He acknowledges his brother doesn't have the best morals or attitude, but neither of us dreamed it'd be this bad (Who Does think that about a family member?) However, we have argued incessantly about how to proceed from that point. I don't want a thing to do with his brother, to even be in the same location as him. I don't want additional drama, I don't want to keep presenting opportunities for anything else, or something worse, to happen, and I'm afraid of any reactions (whether my own, his, or my husband's) that may take place. I feel this is a very private situation and I don't really desire to involve my husband's entire family, but I understand they'd need to know something, since I won't be partaking in any family gatherings. I've offered to host Christmas %26amp; Thanksgiving dinners at our house, so we can avoid his brother's presence, but my husband insists his family won't make the effort to drive up (they all live about 45 minutes away). He feels, and I quote, ';they shouldn't have to suffer for us not wanting to tolerate [his brother's] presence';. Hearing this sort of made me snap, since I feel *I* shouldn't have to suffer for this man's awful actions. My husband also continually states how I must 'get over it and move on'....but I feel some actions are unforgiveable, and I certainly know these feelings are going to be anything but mullified if I have to be in his brother's presence again. Now, my husband accuses me of 'alienating him from his family', even though I'm now making more of an effort to visit with them than he ever has before this all went down, to keep the peace between us and them and reassure them it's not THEIR fault, nor are we going to be holding it against them. My husband doesn't feel they'll understand ';our'; (namely, my) stance and wishes to not be near his brother, and that it'll just raise a lot of problems and people will be upset against us for 'holding a grudge'. If this was any other matter, I could consider forgiveness and the whole 'getting over it'....but, in my mind, this action was *awful* and I don't even want to associate with people like that - ESPECIALLY if they are family and still capable of such a thing. Needless to say, this has brought GREAT distance between my husband and myself. I'm beginning to feel hostile and unsupported. I feel as if he's not even making an effort to make something work where we don't have to expose ourselves to his brother. I totally am aware there will, ultimately, be events where we'll have to see him, but those situations would be large and important enough to keep the 'past' behind us for the duration. Am I wrong to be feeling this need of seperation from his brother - for both himself and me, as I feel a marriage IS a unity, and he should be standing by my side without any resentment or force?Need some outside advice on marital problem involving in-law...?
    Sweetie you and your husband need to go into some marriage counseling to get direction on how to handle things appropriately concerning the entire family. You have every right not to want any involvement with your brother in law and that's what your husband needs to understand how to deal with so that this matter does not affect what the two of you have together. You should come first and that's the bottom line. This brother in law has no respect for you or his brother and if anyone wants to hold any animosity over it they need to direct it to the man that stepped over the boundary and messed up the family gatherings. Never allow anyone to force you to be in contact with anyone that is not right and endangers your mental well being. He owes you and his brother an apology and needs to get some help for himself because he in my book would be dangerous. Be very careful in this situation because the brother in law should not be trusted. He may say or do anything to retaliate against you to save his own face and do not tolerate anything here. He could be a rapist so watch your back and keep a close eye on things. This is just horrible for you and no matter what it may cost you just stay away from this man. Need some outside advice on marital problem involving in-law...?
    *shakes head* what do you mean he molested you? Were you passed out or something?
    what he did was a crime and police should have been called as far as i am concerned. if your husband is not 100% with you than maybe you should get rid of him too
    i agree with twosey that your husband needs to have a conversation with his brother. your husband does not know how to deal with this which is why he is telling you to get over it. tell him you will NEVER get over it and tell him what you think he should do (confront his brother). tell him you understand how this conflict makes him uncomfortable, but there is a right way to handle it and a wrong way. too bad. tell him to handle it the right way, which is to support you and to confront your brother. after the confrontation, then there can be discussions, not decisions, about how to proceed with family gatherings. good luck.
    Your brother-in-law molested you. His problem.


    The aftereffects of his attack on you are now you - and your husbands -problems.


    Whenever you let anger guide your decisions, you will lose sight of the objective. Letting anger come between you and your husband is now endangering your marriage.


    My best advice is, try to let it go. Make peace with your husband, go to the social gatherings...but next time the brother-in-law even comes near you, let your feelings be known. Maybe with a Taser, or pepper spray.
    I think you feeling and needing to stay away from this brother is perfectly normal and understandable. I do think you DO need to resolve the matter within yourself though too and forgive and forget. BUt that doesn't mean you EVER have to trust him again nor does it mean you have to suddenly have this personal warm relationship with him again either. What he did was intolerable and out of line completely. When someone ELSE didn't experience it they can NEVER fully empathize - especially another man (your husband). He has tried to be supportive and understanding but I think to expect his continued support of you HOLDING ON TO THIS Is asking too much of him. He didn't experience it - you did. And, after all he does love his brother and in his mind he has to resolve the issue on your part and on the brothers part in his heart %26amp; mind. Which he has done apparently. SO he's ready for YOU to move on.





    The problem though is that when a women has been and felt violated like this there is no TIME TABLE to be over it. It's a process. I would just suggest that you make sure you are IN THE PROCESS and not holding on to it intentionally. Maybe you should go see a counselor or therapist for some brief sessions that might help you here. I think you shouldn't expect your husband to alienate his brother. Neither should he expect that you just take this brother back into your embrace and relationship circle in a trusting loving way. Maybe ever! Has the brother ever apologized? That could be a core issue here. Has your husband ever confronted him about it? I think he needs to.





    I think a few things need to happen to help this along and maybe you and your hubby both need to go into counseling for a short time. It might really make a difference. THIS was a traumatic emotional event for YOU and he isn't wanting it to remain that anymore and you can't let it go yet. SO it coming between you might lead to disasterous results without HELP. I think there are a lot of things here that need attention and professional support and intervention might be the best and only way at this point.
    I think your husband needs to take this up with his brother. He absolutely needs to confront him and suggest that this perverted brother stay out of your way. He should be the one missing out on holidays or parties (out of shame and embarrassment) If he doesn't feel remorse, shouldn't everyone know that he is relentless and a threat?





    In my opinion, your husband is trying to avoid a conflict that he can't avoid. He needs to either support you or not.





    Good luck. That is such a hard situation

    Help i need advice about this problem i got here?

    I just turned 18, and i never had a gf due to because i was really fat but im now in shape for sum reason girls like me now. So anyways i met a girl who is 22 and she has a 2 year old girl, and is currenlty divorced but the babys dad still comes to visit the daughter...


    (I don't want baby daddy problems).......





    Anyways i lied to her i said i was 20, and now we are hitting off Should i stop seeing her, or just flow with it and have fun and enjoy my young life???Help i need advice about this problem i got here?
    You need to tell her the truth... if you guys start to really become good friends, she may or may not be liking you for the wrong reasons... you don't want a LIE to be holding ur relationship together, do you? If she actually likes you for you and not your age, she will probably understand.Help i need advice about this problem i got here?
    Relationships get really complicated when a child is involved. If you do not truly want a serious relationship with her I wouldn't bother. Its not fair to her daughter. Children get attached very easily. Its hard for them to have people go in and out of their lives. Its not going to be like dating every other girl. She is different she is responsible for another life and you have to remember that. She is not going to be able to put you first in her life. If you truly like her you should tell her the truth about your age. I promise it will come out sooner or later. Better now before you get attached. A relationship will never work based on a lie.





    I really hope I helped and you make the right decision, Good luck and I think its great you are interested in her despite the fact she has a child. Most guys run the other way. So good for you!!

    New job???!! Any advice for my problem!? -will choose best answer-?

    I have been working as a hostess at a local restraunt for a couple weeks (it was my first real job) but now im hired at the grocery store, so I have two jobs now.





    Ill be bagging at the grocery store and getting carts.. that type of thing.


    Yesterday after the training I was supposed to work today (the 2nd) because there is a big 12 hour meat sale... I called to see when I was supposed to come in and the schedule making lady (not sure if shes manager or not o.o) Told me 5 pm to 8pm and I was like





    WTF





    Because the hiring manager knew that i cant work between 5 and 10 at night because i host at the restraunt during dinner! He knew this before they hired me and he said that the grocery store would work around it. He also told another manager that i was goin to be the new ';day time clerk';





    The scheduler woman didnt know about my restraunt schedule but why didnt the hiring manager tell her? Is it going to be like this all the time? I cant work between 5pm and 10pm will they get that or do i have to tell them every day when they sign me up to work!





    Is it just because im new so the schedule is messed up alot? They wont fire me for being ';picky'; because of my hosting job would they?!





    Any advice would be nice, has anyone else had experiences like this?New job???!! Any advice for my problem!? -will choose best answer-?
    I too used to work two jobs and this same thing happened to me. What I ended up having to do was asking the manager or whomever does the scheduling put a note under my name saying not available to work from 5pm to 10pm. It is most likely a communicaton error on their part or was just simply forgotten. I am sure you can clear this up and continue to work both jobs. Good Luck! You sound like a hardworker! New job???!! Any advice for my problem!? -will choose best answer-?
    make it very clear that you can't, and won't be there during those hours. if they can't follow your wishes, you shouldn't have to work for them anyways....

    Please help, adult advice on teenage problem? :(?

    hi, alright so this is the story:


    im 16 years old, junior in highschol, gets good grades, and still a virgin, most of my friends arent virgins and they always make fun of me for being a virgin but dont worry, i dont get fooled. i WANT to wait til marriage and i WILL wait till marriage regards to whatever they say.


    couple days ago, as a joke, my friend (as a joke) typed this funny ';contract';that says ';I, (MY NAME) WILL LOSE MY VIRGINTY'; when i sign that i agreed to lose my virginity before senior year, we all laughed about it (i dont take it personally) and they all faked my signature on it and so on.. so after all the laughing and joking around, like friends do, i kept the piece of paper with me so no one would find it, i put it in my purse so id throw it away at home, but i seemed to forgot and my mom (behind my back) looked through my purse and found that paper. now, i have two older sisters (18 and 20) and they both live with us and she showed them it. so when i came home after school, i walked in the door, my 18 yr old sister calls me a **** and gives me a dirty looks, i didnt think anything of it as we dont get along, so i just went upstairs to my room and my 20 yr old sister opens my door and calls me a whore. and leaves. then my mom comes in, and she told me she found this in my purse (the contract) i decided to tell her the truth that all kids tease me and it was just a joke between my friends and she should know better that i wont do that.


    but the thing that hurt me the most was that she showed two of my sisters (there planning on telling my dad) before she confronted me. i never had a good relationship with my mom or sisters because im just different, im more mellow and easy going and gets along with anyone, while there full of drama and are the biggest racist people you will ever meet.


    im really sorry if this is long, but i dont have anyone to talk to, and there is no way i will ever talk to my mom about anything again as it seems that i cant trust her :/ help. is it my fault? what do i do?Please help, adult advice on teenage problem? :(?
    No, it's not your fault. Your Mom has trust issues for sure as she went through your purse behind your back. Plus she told your sisters about it before talking to you. I can understand her being upset when she found it, I have three daughters and would have freaked out also, but I would never have gone in your purse. If she thought you were doing drugs, or something else, she may have done this for a reason, but you say, you haven't given her a reason to distrust you. Evidently, your family has some problems. You do have someone to speak to, it's your school counselor. Go immediately and ask to speak with him or her and tell this story. They will help you. Also, there are clergy men and women who will help you when you explain this to them. Do you have a trusted aunt or uncle who could talk to your Mom and Dad and sisters about this distrust problem? Never feel there is no one to speak with, because there always is that counselor. School counselors are trained to handle this kind of family problem. Good luck - I'll say a prayer for you.Please help, adult advice on teenage problem? :(?
    Aww that sucks.


    It'll definately pass with time you just need to let it go and


    if you want you can talk to her more about it. Tell your sisters to stop being such twats.


    You sound like you're better than them.
    oh wow this is kinda hard to answer, all you can do is say my ways arent worse then urs, and just keep telling them the truth and stuff, and tell one of ur closest freinds who was there to tell ur mom / sisters what really happened
    No, it's not your fault that your family isn't as understanding and supportive as you'd like them to be. You can email me and talk to me anytime. I'll listen. Good luck :)
    You need to get some new friends. The friends you have now are not really your friends or they would have never done something so rude to you.
    Yes it is your fault.


    Don't allow your friends to play such dirty tricks with you. There should be always a red line they shouldn't cross.
    well atleast it was a good read, lol





    at the end of the day you aint done nothing wrong, your surrounded by idiots tho.
    come open your body is a temple and has close doors so dont open it to some dumby butt ok
    It isn't yore fault. You have a hard family, just that
    Don't let it get to you. It is not your fault. My family is the same way, just ignore them.
    fyi **** isnt a bad word! haha lol
    Oh my ??
    okay first off you should of through it away at school and you should ignore your sisters and mom they have no right to call you that but dont let them bring you down because you no u not one im 17 im stilll a virgin and im waiting till marriage=] dont kill yourself thats not going solve anything try talking to a counselor i do or you can message me on myspace shaquisha_010@yahoo.com
    It's no ones ';fault'; in my opinion. You could have remembered to ditch the note ... or your mom could have not pawed through your purse ... or your sisters could have had more faith in you. But none of those things happened. So it's water under the bridge.





    What I would suggest is to go to your dad before the sister act can and tell him the whole story. I expect he'll recognize the behavior.





    So far as your mother is concerned, maybe you can ask a friend over after school one day and have the friend explain the whole thing to her. Although, if she doesn't believe you she probably won't believe your friend.





    Plan B would be to just drop the whole thing and hope they will, too. You know in your heart what the truth is. There's no real need to get yourself all worked up just because they don't know the truth and are seemingly determined not to know it.





    Be your same self. Be as friendly as you can be, don't upset the household apple cart and go on as best you can. Good luck to you, and I'm sorry you've found yourself in this situation.
    first id like to say good job...im waiting for the right person as well! Now in terms of that incident...id say you should confront your mom and tell her that your very angry at her for going through your purse without your permission and how it wasnt right for her to do that and on top of that, ask her why she had to open her big mouth and tell your (sounds like 2 complete b*tches if you ask me) rude b*tchy sisters before speaking to you. And once again explain to her that it was an inside joke between you and your friends and she has no right to assume the worse. Then tell your sisters off and be like do you really think im you...ok dont call me a whore when you and blah blah blah...my god i hate your sisters and i dont even know them! %26gt;:(
    I'm really sorry about what happened. You should not be ashamed that your still a virgin. Your whole family kind of sounds mean and I'm really sorry. This is not your fault at all. I don't really know what you can do but if you need someone to talk to I'm here for you. And I know what its like when there is no one to talk to. I would talk to your friends.
    it seems you are being treated unfairly and your sisters at that age should grow up and act their age. I think you need to rise above them, let them know how you see things and tell your mon your unhappy with things as they are,


    If you believe you are not at fault and your being mistreated make a stand - tell your sisters to mind their own business and grow up.
    That's an invasion with privacy.





    YOur mom is mental and is not being a good parent.





    It's hard to trust a parent once they've proven untrustworthy, ditto with their children.





    Right now, I guess, just continue proving you're trustworthy, and from experienced, it took me all my life, until mom died. Yes, I'm more trustworthy than my sister, but parents have a problem believing that because of their insecurities. They're just human.





    A bonus for your wanting to remain virgin, until marriage, don't be pressured to something you're not ready for.
    next time rip up incriminating evidence and dispose of it were you are and im sorry that really sucks and is very very low of them i would suggest you talk to your dad quickly and get it over with and suggest family conseling ...good chance to embarrass them for stepping out of line...gl hun
    First of all, be mindful of the situation you have with your Mom and sisters. I am sure that if you had thought of it, you would have thrown the paper away before you got home.





    Now, you are going to have to take this as a tremendous learning and maturation experience which will ultimately make you a far stronger, more intelligent, and successful person than they are because you need to rise above it.





    Take a hard look at your present environment....every aspect...school, home, everything...and figure out what needs to change...and change it. Even though you may not like it, it is time for you to change.





    You are too young to leave your home, and you should respect your Mom (regardless of your feeling about her), so take this time to prepare yourself for adulthood...which in this case means getting good enough grades to earn grant and scholarship money to go away to college on your own where you will prepare yourself for a successful life.





    I really wish I could tell you something more positive, but this is a reality check and it happens to everyone at some point in their life...including me.





    You may email me if you have to.





    Good Luck
    first


    i am glad that you are who you are


    and i am gld that you know what you want for the future.





    well i know kids in school tend to be idiots i would say and inmature.


    i have to say they don't know s#it





    well you did right to take the later away.


    the only mistake you did.


    is this one you didn't destroy the paper.





    once your mother found this.


    probably she didn't know what to do and freaked out.


    that is why she went to your sisters thinking that probably


    they could give her a better answer on how to deal with this problem.





    i know how girls at.


    and sorry if i offend you.


    but most likely when it comes to this type of problems.


    females do not know what to do.





    do not feel bad.


    i have to have to say your sisters


    are inmature.





    the first thing they should it done is


    talk to you.


    no call you a bitc#





    well just get a couple of friend of yours the person that actually wrote the note. and take him/her home.


    it has to be in a day when only mom and you are home.


    so you could have a really private conversation ok.


    make sure your sisters are not there.


    and make sure your mom does not get mad at the person that is


    telling her the truth. ok





    let her know it was a joke.


    we didn't ment to offend your daughter.





    make sure someone talks to mom





    ok


    good luck


    hope this help
    no of corse its not you fault. time will pass and they will forget about it :)





    and as for you 'friends' .. guys prefer virgins! as they no they havnt been round the block. and they also think that virgins have a tighter vagina so it will feel better in sex than sumbody that had lots of sex and is all loose :)
    Well, Stella my love, I'm very proud of you for your convictions. Your mom should be more proud of you as well. You are doing a good job of resisting peer pressure. Real friends would be supportive of your ideals and not want you to do anything that was unsafe, illegal or against your moral principals. What others think of you will not change the truth. I have a feeling that some of your friends may only pretending to have lost their virginity. I don't know why as it's nothing to be proud of.
  • eyeshadow pencil
  • I found a rat in the tiny room dat i keep my dog's kennel in, we hav never had this problem! pls advice!?

    It's like a tiny laundry room right next to the kitchen, also has a back door that faces the front lawn, but we used to use to go the backyard, I don't know how it got there!! I only just saw it today, looked like a pretty small one, saw it quickly run behind the washing machine when i went in there to get my dog's toy. Rats freak the crap outta me!! :( :( Can't help it. but i want it out of there, especially cos of my 10mth Border collie, I've heard its not safe if my pup tries to kill it or gets in contact with rats, not to mention what if the rat pee'ed inside his kennel or in his bowl, which i kept aside now. Can I do something or do i have to call the pest control? I live in Auckland, New Zealand, is pest control expensive?I found a rat in the tiny room dat i keep my dog's kennel in, we hav never had this problem! pls advice!?
    There is a product that is sold which comes in like a green looking solid bar...you break off pieces %26amp; place in areas [hidden from other critters or kids]...the rats will eat it %26amp; the chemical in the stuff actually kills the rat from inside out...no dead rats laying around or smell! IF you are interested in just using a deterrent then place cotton balls dipped in peppermint oil near problem areas...also using kitty litter can be a repellent. Good luck!I found a rat in the tiny room dat i keep my dog's kennel in, we hav never had this problem! pls advice!?
    try getting a cat as a temporary pet until it eats the whole problem... believe me, a cat will definitively end up your troubles.
    remove the rat(trap) clean the room %26amp; dont leave food around to attract rat's %26amp; mice just feed the dog then remove it's dish


    ---no food no rats--
    Pest control may cost XXXX amount what ever it may be... Instead of that try out by keeping a rat at your place it would not cost you any thing. ( Borrow it from a friend)
    It's probably drawn to the dogs food supply.


    Keep his food picked up after he's done. Keep the supply in a rat proof container like a small metal trash can with a tight lid. Take expanding foam (in a spraycan) and fill the gaps that might come into the room (especially look behind the washer dryer, and around plumbing.)


    Put a trap out but make sure the dog can't get near it. Make sure to wash the floors and kennel if you think the rat was there. The droppings carry disease.

    I need some advice, got a problem with my ex boyfriend?

    My Ex Boyfriend and his family are always moaning about the way the relationship ended but should i have to put up with it now that i have another man?





    My ex Harry is a sweet boy and i really did like him and i thought he was cute, but Steve (my current) can take much better care of me. He is a big strong football player with muscles far bigger than harry's.





    Steve had liked me for quite a while before we got together and he arranged to meet up with Harry to have a fight and winner got to be with me :). Harry objected strongly and kept saying and wrong it was or that is was uncomfortable for him. So i threatened to leave him if he didn't step up for the fight. (because i want a man, not a coward) So harry showed up and tried to reason with Steve but Steve beat the holy crap outta him and that is why I am with Steve today because he is strong and tough and every girl's dream.





    Should i feel guilty about Harry though? He is threatening to take me to court but he is in the wrong because he keeps using emotional blackmailI need some advice, got a problem with my ex boyfriend?
    if your happy with him who care what your ex family thinks

    I Need Help Advice About a Problem i Have?

    Well it Started Off With Me and this girl falling in love with each other i loved her she loved me etc etc.





    Then just when we were gonna go out 1 week later she says she doesnt feel as strong in the same way Then she went out with this guy.





    I got hurt but i got over it but because this guy knows i liked her he doesnt want me around her (he doesnt know that she feel in love with me)





    She thinks he doesnt mean it that way even when i have full proof evidence saying it is that way and everytime we get over it we make peace he brings it back up in a week or so and we fight again.





    I dont know what to do like i wanna bash him cause hes caused me alot of trouble and hes making threats but on the other hand i dont want to hurt my close friend (his girlfriend) like i've been pushed to my limits with this guy i hate him cause hes turning her against me bit by bit and i need advice on what to do cause honestly i dont know anymore.I Need Help Advice About a Problem i Have?
    ';Try'; your best to move on. If it doesn't work, here's what you do. Get a group of friends to plan an outing, but they are all in on this plan. Invite her and make sure she goes alone without the fag of a bf. Your friends slowly leave one by one leaving both of you together. Talk to her about EVERYTHING even about the way you think the fagshit is pushing her away from you.

    PLEASE I need advice immediately! Huge problem!!!?

    I started seeing this guy about a week ago. Right off the bat he tells me that he owns his own home and truck and is an electrician. I found out the next day through property records that the house is actually his sister and brother-in-law's home and their truck. (Still not sure if he's really an electrician) He invited me back to his house after our date and told me that his sister was there just to use his computer.





    I'm not sure what else he's lied about but this is the main thing I have a problem with. We have spent a lot of time together the past week and he's really a nice guy. Another important detail about this is the fact that he hasn't made a move on me... NOTHING. Not even a hug. Nothing. So I know it's not about sex. I'm just so crushed that he lied to me!





    Well today I just needed some time to think things over and get my head straight so I avoided his calls (turned my phone off) He just showed up at my house about 30 minutes ago and banged on my door for a good 30 minutes then left a note then left. And this is a guy who supposedly has to get up for work at 4am and drive 55 miles away to Houston. It freaked me out!





    What exactly is up with this guy and how do I handle this? What should I say to him??!!PLEASE I need advice immediately! Huge problem!!!?
    no man you've known less than a month or for just a week should be banging on your door and no man with sense bangs for 30 minutes.... what was he going to do when you opened it? what did his note say? he sounds so weird, something about him just doesn't seem right, i'm telling you, a man living with his sister, lying about his accomplishments and possessions and he doesn't want to just get laid?...... strange.PLEASE I need advice immediately! Huge problem!!!?
    So you are asking a question that I think you already know the answer to. He has lied about the house, possibly the job, and God knows what else. Sorry, but if someone lied to me about big things like that, I would not date them anymore. It shows that you can't trust him if you already went looking up homeowners records this early on, but it looks like you may have dodged a bullet by doing so.





    You don't owe him any explanation. All you need to say to him is ';Did you think I wouldn't find out?'; and let him panic a little. Right then is a good moment to tell him that you cant see him anymore because he lies too much.





    I do recommend breaking it off with him. The lies are only going to get worse.
    sounds like a sociopath,, buy some mace,, and maybe a gun
    ok, im sorry i cant answer your question bc im still trying to figure out how the heck you seen some property records in the first place????? u snooping on him? if ur already snooping you need to end it anywayz bc it's not going to work!
    He's lying to you but he probobly actually likes you and only lied so that he wouldn't be embaressed that he can't afford his own car and home..and who knows if he actually has a job (let's say that he isn't an electricion...since he did show up at your house like that).





    I think you need to call him on his bluff, what he's doing isn't right and also not making much sense since he hasn't made a move...his motivation however might not be sex..but then telling the truth would be better.





    But call him out on it, and tell him how upset it made you. See what he says....but I suggest dropping him, sounds a bit weird...unstable perhaps?
    Sounds like a guy who really likes you and wants to impress you. Let hi, know you know and you don't care. If he comes clean then keep dating, if he continues the lie then dump him.

    What's your advice for this problem?

    What's your advice for this problem?


    i am illegal here in the US. my 3 year visa expired last december 5th of 2008. and tried everything i could to process my papers in rightful and lawful manners. but nothing happened.





    some people push me to marry someone for the sake of 'green card'. what is the stand of the church about this?





    i know they mean to just 'be practical' but is it immoral? facing such moral dilemmas and ethical problems bring me to a greater question 'what is more important in life?'


    considering that i am married and have 2 kids waiting for me in cuba. my wife and my 2 kids are waiting for me. but there's no way i can get them. and we just live a simple life in cuba.


    i know i will earn a lot here in the US but i also have this pain of choosing work instead of being with my family. but you also have this mentality that your the head of the family and you should be the provider. but i know my presence is not there.


    maybe i am just afraid of becoming like my father who left us when i was a kid and came back after 15 years. i always ask myself: should i stay? or go home? i don't know. but i still have time to think.


    what's your advice?


    thanks.What's your advice for this problem?
    Christ taught to obey the laws of the land, so if you are here illegally, it's time to go. When and if the time comes for you to come back, come then, with your family. Since you are already married, you can't marry someone else for a green card. Not only is that illegal, it's unethical and immoral. And you are asking what the Church thinks about it? No Church will marry you under those circumstances...it's illegal and immoral, remember. You have concern over leaving your family, and you are right to have this concern. Go be with your family. What do you gain if you gain the whole world and loose your soul. Do the right thing. It's more important to be with your family to be an example to them, with them than to be far off some place illegally. And do you not realize how hard it is for everyone here now. There's no guarantee you'll really do well here when so many people are loosing their jobs. If you are caught as an illegal alien, you will be deported and NOT allowed back in for breaking the law now. Do the right thing, be patient, go to your family and keep trying to get in legally, with your family with you. Good luck.What's your advice for this problem?
    My advice is to follow the rule of law and work to become a citizen. Even if this means returning to Cuba for a short time and enduring some hardships, you'll only gain that much more respect for persevering and becoming a citizen through hard work and determination... not by receiving a handout.
    Sorry bud, you're gonna have to go back home. There are millions of other people trying to get here too, and they are doing so legally. You have no right to be here.





    I sympathize with you wanting a better life for your family, but we have to respect our laws or we'll have anarchy.
    Join the military. When I was in there were a whole lot of people that weren't cititzens fighting for our country. My own roomate was from Laos..not a citizen. Point is go ahead and die for my freedom you just cant live here.....unless you have blonde hair and blue eyes.





    Kinda makes me mad..but I say your welcome to stay.
    Marrying to obtain a green card is a federal offense and a felony. If you're caught (and you probably will be) not only will you be deported, but your ';wife'; will go to jail. Rethink that option....
    You are a deliberate criminal... get out and don't come back
    You are being exploited in the US, you should return home for your own good. Or hand yourself in to the immigration authorities and claim asylum
    If you were here illegally you would not be foolish enough to advertise it on Yahoo answers.....
    go back to your wife n kids.. and when you can come here Legally then come on in..
    go back to mexico
    don't you think it's your responsibility to be there for your kids?
    To be honest... you probably won't earn much in the U.S. unless you have some sort of specialized talents.





    I would probably go home at that point, especially if you're thinking about the way your father was. If you resent him for it, then empathize with your kids.





    ALSO: To the person who said, ';go back to mexico,'; THE GUY IS FROM CUBA, DUMDUM!





    To the people who said, ';get here legally,'; he DID get here legally. It EXPIRED due to the stupid red tape! D@mn bureaucracy!
    The U.S. as a nation has been raped more by its own citizens than any illegal immigrants could hope to.





    Personally I don't think your doing this is a big deal. It seems like you're just trying to provide a good life for yourself and your family.





    You can get married outside of church, so consider that you could try to marry someone and get it annulled after your citizenship is finalized. Since government is in the mix, marriage is more a convenience than an institution (the divorce rate speaks to that).
    As someone who lives in Arizona, and has illegal immigrants everywhere here, I will start off by commending you for getting a work visa to start with. You've already made more of an effort than most people do.





    The law is the law, and should be obeyed. HOWEVER, family comes first. I would personally risk being thrown in Jail or deported or whatever for my family. I hate illegal immigration so much, BUT I do understand why it happens.





    If you've had a job for the last three years, and you've been paying taxes. Then morally (not legally) I think it's ok to bend the rules a little.





    If you have not been paying taxes, and have not been contributing to this country, then I apologize, I vote you leave America and never come back.





    Best of luck to you though. I never wish anyone harm.

    Need help and advice about family problem?

    I am 12 and i have recently found out that my dad has been having an affair, and he also has had a baby with the woman, who is now 5 months old. My dad has been living with her and some days he comes home to see me and my brother and my sister. I also self harm which is very hard to cope with and i am trying to stop, i am suicidal sometimes and once i nearly tried to kill myself. My mum gets really stressed about this and most days i just want to run away, but im too scared to, i feel like i need a break on my own even if i stay in a hotel for a night or so, but i cant as im too young. please help and give advice.


    emma xNeed help and advice about family problem?
    the self mutilation needs to stop because no one wants you to hurt. its not right what your dad has done to the family but theres nothing you can do but accept it. have you tried sitting your dad down and telling him how you feel? there are counselors available at your school and you really should see one. dont hurt yourself, youre too young to be dealing with problems like this. you need to get away and talk to someone else. do you have a close relative that would let you stay with them for a little while? or come visit for a whole weekend? whatever you do, please dont continue hurting yourself. suicide is the worst thing thats ever happened to my family, and i promise it would be to yours too. good luck sweetie.Need help and advice about family problem?
    I know how you feel, but hurting yourself will solve nothing.


    me= grandpa, I pray for you and wish I can help you


    your dad is selfish, he should have loved the 3 of you more than ANYTHING in the world, even if he is a wedower


    try to be strong for your brother and sister, you can talk to me once in while


    ya_shami@yahoo.ca


    I have a girl who is willing to talk to you
    Go to a counselor ASAP nothing more to say.


    I will keep you in my prayers.
    This is a tough one, you are only 12, and the situation is not good for you, sometimes adults do very bad things, and they don't relize how they hurt the people that love them, your Mom right now is also having a hard time, and she does not want to see you hurt, so why not try to help your mother, and the same time you will be helping yourself to become STRONG!!! life can to unfair but just remember things will get better, just give them time, nothing is greater than your life!!! Your friends can also play a part in your life right now, why not try staying with a friend or a relitive when you are feeling down, and you are doing the right thing ---talking about it. Good Luck
    Oh Emma, I am sorry, the same thing happened to me but it was mom who left us %26amp; I wasn't quite so young as you. You must realize your self harm comes from not having the tools to deal with all this stress.





    There are many counselors who are garbage %26amp; cannot help you - but there are some wonderful ones that can. Make sure to find one that you truly connect with that you can talk to.





    Being on your own may sound like a good idea but it may be a better idea to go %26amp; stay with other family for a few days, out of the city or even the state if you can. Call up some cousins or grandparents %26amp; ask if they can let you stay for a few days. This is more important than school right now so taking a few days or a week off will not do anything worse for you than staying in this mess.





    I encourage you to talk to your dad %26amp; mom about what is happening, it is brutal for anyone to go through, not just you, %26amp; your reactions are NORMAL, don't add on to it by feeling guilty that you don't know how to handle it - no one is prepared for this kind of loss.





    Don't run away. Don't harm yourself. Talk to as many people as you can about this that you trust. Teachers, school counselor, church advisor, older friend, relative - even if they are not your own teacher or relative but you know %26amp; like them - tell everyone who will listen. That support system will help you through a HUGE portion of this pain.





    It WILL pass sweetheart, although it doesn't feel that way now - things will get better sometime...but for now, tell everyone who will listen what you're going through!
    I know its hard hunny but hang in there don't give up. Your mom and brother and sister need you right now. just think how much your mom and your brother and sister are hurting right now, and picture that 10 times worse if you were no longer around. suicide hurts everyone but you. its a selfish way out even though it may seem like the only way out. i had a very rough childhood too, and i tried the whole running away thing and sneaking out and girly let me tell you it really doesn't help. i ended up preggo at 16 and am now a mom of 3 and i am only 20. if you need someone to talk to you can e-mail me. i love to help people, and i always wished i had someone to talk to when i was younger. my e-mail address is best.mom.around@gmail.com and i have a myspace too. you cam look me up. i would love to try and talk you through this. once again hang in there, try to find something to get your mind off of it. or to get out of the house in a positive way. try getting a babysitting job. that always helped me to get out when i was younger. good luck hun. ill pray for you. e-mail me anytime you need too.
  • eyeshadow pencil
  • I really need advice! eating disorder problem?

    Im 5'3'' and right now i weight 103-4 pounds. this is up from 88 pounds. im recovering from anorexia and im finding it REALY hard dealing with the weight gain. im not eating more than 1300 cals a day and im getting really frustrated that i keep gettin fatter and fatter. i feel like a huge pig and today i noticed my butt sticks out a ton.


    i didnt exercise yesterday and i think that's why that happened.


    .


    my doctor actually wants me to reach 112-115 pounds and im TERRIFIED of getting up there...





    can someone advise me on how to change my attitude toward recovery? i am very determined to recover and im already eating well for nearly 4 months but its just so frustrating!!


    thanksI really need advice! eating disorder problem?
    How old are you? Because if you're an adult and that's all you weigh, it's kind of scary. If you're a teenager, realize you're probably still growing. Also, I want you to know that I am a size zero and I'm a fashion model and I weight 112, so it is not a weight you should in any way be terrified of. And the fact that you noticed your butt sticks out is GOOD! Everyone is supposed to have a butt. I'm assuming you're a girl, and guys find butts attractive! Not only that, but it'll be a lot more comfortable to sit down on. But also, try not to look at yourself in the mirror sideways. I find that I think I look awful from the side, but from the front you will look great, you won't point out your butt or your tummy (not that you have one of course). Believe me, you are definitely NOT fat, and will feel so much better once you reach a more normal weight. Also, I weigh the least out of anyone I know, so if you look around, look at your friends, particularly ones that are comfortable with their bodies and have a lot of self confidence, and you'll realize that there's no way you look like a pig. I didn't mean that to say your friends look like pigs, but the average weight is way closer to somewhere around 150 lbs or so, so just stop thinking about you're weight because you're below average no matter what.I really need advice! eating disorder problem?
    lmao your fine your actualy a bit underweight now.





    im 5';4 and i weigh 114 pounds





    im actualy closer to underweight then overweight and im a guy





    chillax, im sure you look fine

    Which advice would you give to this difficult problem ??

    Hi


    Please advice on this with good energy and open heart


    The case is the fallowing : a couple that are keeping a relationship almost 5 years , boy is 31 years old and girl is 30 , she is jpanese , he is from south america , she has a good job , education , financial security , on the other hand , the boy does not have a university degree or any savings at all and his family is very poor , so he just went out from his country , how this couple can be together ?, for sure they love each other , but how love can be enough for them to be happy ?


    is there way for them to be together ?... if the boy can not get a visa should be working anyway in any country for be close to girlfriend ??


    is there any way for so different people in so different situations to make a family together ?


    Which advice would you give to this difficult problem ??
    A few countries will welcome the woman as an immigrant: Canada, Australia and New Zealand. If they get married, the man can go with her.Which advice would you give to this difficult problem ??
    Maybe she can join him in his south american country and live there. She could teach japanese or something. Japan is not very welcoming of foreigners who want to settle there.
    just go ahead and get married, you've been together for five years, that's long enough.





    love has no color or background.

    Really need some advice on this problem!!?

    For about a year now I almost constantly hear a weird noise in my right ear. It drives me nuts! It either fades or gets worse depending on the angle I tilt my head. Ive been to 2 dif doctors about it, and when they examined inside my ear they said i have fluid trapped (like an ear infection). Ive had an ear infection before tho and it hurt and was totally dif than this. Anyway the docs gave me antibiotics both times which did nothing. Does anyone know what could be the cause of this and how to get rid of it? For about the same amount of time I have also had enlarged tonsils.. not sure if that has anything to do with it... also, i am a smoker.Really need some advice on this problem!!?
    Your question sounds more serious. I suggest that you should consult to expert for health advice. A service platform which may help to solve your problems is recommended to you. You can have a look at it at http://www.tcmdiscovery.com/publichealth/

    I need some advice about a problem?

    I'm having second thoughts about being in my college's marching band. I just don't really feel enthused about it and don't know if i really want to devote my time to it. i'm just worried about messing up the drill by leaving. I have a limited amount of time to decide,by Thursday actually. I like music and playing the trumpet,but just don't know if i want to continue marching,what should i do? I need some advice about a problem?
    I think that if you're having second thoughts about it you should leave. I mean if you're not exciting already then why do it? Besides, you could always join another club! I'm sure there's something you could find that interests you.





    :)

    I need some advice for this problem with my Boyfriend?

    Okay so where should I start off . My boyfriend and I have been bestfriends for almost 2 years so far . He knows basially everything about me and all my little dark secrets . We just got together like 1 month ago though . Well anyways i have a problem, well DUH 'cause your reading this . Hahahs .








    So anyway this is where the problem starts he just recently became real close to this one guy who now he calls his bestfriend . They have all classes together, like all the same things, %26amp; etc. They hang out basically EVERYDAY . School and even out of school ! I mean I get that it's his bestfriend and all but it's just like i'm the one feeling left out . Like you know how when a person hangs out with a couple they feel like the third wheel ? No not for me, whenever me, my boyfriend, and his bestfriend hang out i'm basically the third wheel 'cause they talk about things they know about and like there little insiders . I mean yeah i know, ';Bros before Hoes'; but this is really too much . I mean just recently when my boyfriend and i, just us, were hanging out he was saying ';I miss[his bestfriend]'; and like i was just quiet . And him %26amp; i just kept walking and he just said it again like ';Man, I really miss [his bestfriend] . And like in my head i'm like WTF, i know ! Who cares ! And other times he'd be like, ';Have you seen [his bestfriend]';, ';I hope [his bestfriend] is coming today';, and other things like that . Or he'll like tell me like a certain funny kind of have-to-be-there moment between them . It's just really irritating ! Is it just me thinking this is way out of line ? Or I shouldn't be worrying ?








    %26amp; Now recently his bestfriend is trying to get with this girl . So his bestfriend is now just hanging with that girl and my boyfriend is somewhat alone . In my head i'm like ';HAHA, get a taste of your own medicine'; but like ugh, i have no clue . I would talk to him about it, but i mean i know he'll flip out . I mean who wouldn't if your girlfriend or boyfriend came out saying ';you hang with so and so too much'; . I am not a clingy, nagging, or whatever kind of girlfriend . I don't even show i'm mad when he does stuff like this, sometimes . But yeah, I never complain !








    So yeaah, ADVICE is really really needed right now .


    So please send something !








    %26amp;P.S,


    MY BOYFRIEND IS NOT GAY . SO DON'T EVEN THINK THAT . HAHA, WHENEVER I TOLD MY FRIENDS ABOUT IT THERE LIKE ';OMG THERE LIKE BOYFRIENDS'; . BUT NO ! I KNOW FOR A FACT MY BOYFRIEND IS NOT GAY, HE IS 100% STRAIGHT .I need some advice for this problem with my Boyfriend?
    Well you could ignore it and hope that his bestfriend gets with that girl and then he would spend all his time with her then ud get your bf back but i'd suggest that you need to talk 2 your bf if you 2 are bestfriends he will understand what your saying, don't have a rant just ask if you and him can spend some time together, go bowling, cinema etc. If he doesn't understand then he's not worth being with sorry but i'm sure he will totally understand.


    PS this happened with me and my bf when we 1st got together so I know how it feels just talk 2 him like i did and now weve been together 3 years. :) Good Luck Hun xI need some advice for this problem with my Boyfriend?
    it'll probably just be a phase, i'd tell him how you feel though. if you dont tell him, he clearly wont know theres a problem. dont have a go at him, just say that you miss seeing him.
    Hi,


    One is definitely tempted tof believe that he is gay! However, you have dispelled that opinion. My candid advise is that you should have a candid heart-to-heart talk with him. He probably is unaware that he is hurting you. I hope you live happily ever after
    Sounds to me like he needs to get his priorities straight. Your girl should always come first. Talk to him about it. If there's one thing that guys are terrible at, it's guessing what a girl is thinking. I would know.
    Boys aint normally that way.I mean i too hav many guy frndz but they've never showed more interest in going out wid a guy than a gal.Now as u r saying he is not a gay,we'll hav 2 cut that option off.


    It might be possible that your boyfrnd is sharing somthn ....somthng very secretive [relaed 2 boiz] 2 his frnd...n so has get along wid him more nicely...or maybe he is just tryna check you or somthng...or maybe he really takes that guy as his best frnd...


    At this situation i think u must go upto him...n clear everything once and for all...its no use keeping everything 2 urself ...have d guts 2 speak up your mind.but watever u say,make it in the sweetest way possible...


    u really need best wishes!!!


    BEST OF LUCK!!!

    Need some outside advice on marital problem involving in-law...?

    Without going into much detail, my husband's brother sexually molested me one night (obviously, against my will and to my great shock). It didn't progress too far, since I put an immediate stop to it, but I still have the lingering feelings of violation, shattered trust, fear, guilt, etc. I informed my husband immediately, who was obviously stunned, but admits he does believe me. He acknowledges his brother doesn't have the best morals or attitude, but neither of us dreamed it'd be this bad (Who Does think that about a family member?) However, we have argued incessantly about how to proceed from that point. I don't want a thing to do with his brother, to even be in the same location as him. I don't want additional drama, I don't want to keep presenting opportunities for anything else, or something worse, to happen, and I'm afraid of any reactions (whether my own, his, or my husband's) that may take place. I feel this is a very private situation and I don't really desire to involve my husband's entire family, but I understand they'd need to know something, since I won't be partaking in any family gatherings. I've offered to host Christmas %26amp; Thanksgiving dinners at our house, so we can avoid his brother's presence, but my husband insists his family won't make the effort to drive up (they all live about 45 minutes away). He feels, and I quote, ';they shouldn't have to suffer for us not wanting to tolerate [his brother's] presence';. Hearing this sort of made me snap, since I feel *I* shouldn't have to suffer for this man's awful actions. My husband also continually states how I must 'get over it and move on'....but I feel some actions are unforgiveable, and I certainly know these feelings are going to be anything but mullified if I have to be in his brother's presence again. Now, my husband accuses me of 'alienating him from his family', even though I'm now making more of an effort to visit with them than he ever has before this all went down, to keep the peace between us and them and reassure them it's not THEIR fault, nor are we going to be holding it against them. My husband doesn't feel they'll understand ';our'; (namely, my) stance and wishes to not be near his brother, and that it'll just raise a lot of problems and people will be upset against us for 'holding a grudge'. If this was any other matter, I could consider forgiveness and the whole 'getting over it'....but, in my mind, this action was *awful* and I don't even want to associate with people like that - ESPECIALLY if they are family and still capable of such a thing. Needless to say, this has brought GREAT distance between my husband and myself. I'm beginning to feel hostile and unsupported. I feel as if he's not even making an effort to make something work where we don't have to expose ourselves to his brother. I totally am aware there will, ultimately, be events where we'll have to see him, but those situations would be large and important enough to keep the 'past' behind us for the duration. Am I wrong to be feeling this need of seperation from his brother - for both himself and me, as I feel a marriage IS a unity, and he should be standing by my side without any resentment or force?Need some outside advice on marital problem involving in-law...?
    Sweetie you and your husband need to go into some marriage counseling to get direction on how to handle things appropriately concerning the entire family. You have every right not to want any involvement with your brother in law and that's what your husband needs to understand how to deal with so that this matter does not affect what the two of you have together. You should come first and that's the bottom line. This brother in law has no respect for you or his brother and if anyone wants to hold any animosity over it they need to direct it to the man that stepped over the boundary and messed up the family gatherings. Never allow anyone to force you to be in contact with anyone that is not right and endangers your mental well being. He owes you and his brother an apology and needs to get some help for himself because he in my book would be dangerous. Be very careful in this situation because the brother in law should not be trusted. He may say or do anything to retaliate against you to save his own face and do not tolerate anything here. He could be a rapist so watch your back and keep a close eye on things. This is just horrible for you and no matter what it may cost you just stay away from this man. Need some outside advice on marital problem involving in-law...?
    *shakes head* what do you mean he molested you? Were you passed out or something?
    what he did was a crime and police should have been called as far as i am concerned. if your husband is not 100% with you than maybe you should get rid of him too
    i agree with twosey that your husband needs to have a conversation with his brother. your husband does not know how to deal with this which is why he is telling you to get over it. tell him you will NEVER get over it and tell him what you think he should do (confront his brother). tell him you understand how this conflict makes him uncomfortable, but there is a right way to handle it and a wrong way. too bad. tell him to handle it the right way, which is to support you and to confront your brother. after the confrontation, then there can be discussions, not decisions, about how to proceed with family gatherings. good luck.
    Your brother-in-law molested you. His problem.


    The aftereffects of his attack on you are now you - and your husbands -problems.


    Whenever you let anger guide your decisions, you will lose sight of the objective. Letting anger come between you and your husband is now endangering your marriage.


    My best advice is, try to let it go. Make peace with your husband, go to the social gatherings...but next time the brother-in-law even comes near you, let your feelings be known. Maybe with a Taser, or pepper spray.
    I think you feeling and needing to stay away from this brother is perfectly normal and understandable. I do think you DO need to resolve the matter within yourself though too and forgive and forget. BUt that doesn't mean you EVER have to trust him again nor does it mean you have to suddenly have this personal warm relationship with him again either. What he did was intolerable and out of line completely. When someone ELSE didn't experience it they can NEVER fully empathize - especially another man (your husband). He has tried to be supportive and understanding but I think to expect his continued support of you HOLDING ON TO THIS Is asking too much of him. He didn't experience it - you did. And, after all he does love his brother and in his mind he has to resolve the issue on your part and on the brothers part in his heart %26amp; mind. Which he has done apparently. SO he's ready for YOU to move on.





    The problem though is that when a women has been and felt violated like this there is no TIME TABLE to be over it. It's a process. I would just suggest that you make sure you are IN THE PROCESS and not holding on to it intentionally. Maybe you should go see a counselor or therapist for some brief sessions that might help you here. I think you shouldn't expect your husband to alienate his brother. Neither should he expect that you just take this brother back into your embrace and relationship circle in a trusting loving way. Maybe ever! Has the brother ever apologized? That could be a core issue here. Has your husband ever confronted him about it? I think he needs to.





    I think a few things need to happen to help this along and maybe you and your hubby both need to go into counseling for a short time. It might really make a difference. THIS was a traumatic emotional event for YOU and he isn't wanting it to remain that anymore and you can't let it go yet. SO it coming between you might lead to disasterous results without HELP. I think there are a lot of things here that need attention and professional support and intervention might be the best and only way at this point.
    I think your husband needs to take this up with his brother. He absolutely needs to confront him and suggest that this perverted brother stay out of your way. He should be the one missing out on holidays or parties (out of shame and embarrassment) If he doesn't feel remorse, shouldn't everyone know that he is relentless and a threat?





    In my opinion, your husband is trying to avoid a conflict that he can't avoid. He needs to either support you or not.





    Good luck. That is such a hard situation
  • eyeshadow pencil
  • I found a rat in the tiny room dat i keep my dog's kennel in, we hav never had this problem! pls advice!?

    It's like a tiny laundry room right next to the kitchen, also has a back door that faces the front lawn, but we used to use to go the backyard, I don't know how it got there!! I only just saw it today, looked like a pretty small one, saw it quickly run behind the washing machine when i went in there to get my dog's toy. Rats freak the crap outta me!! :( :( Can't help it. but i want it out of there, especially cos of my 10mth Border collie, I've heard its not safe if my pup tries to kill it or gets in contact with rats, not to mention what if the rat pee'ed inside his kennel or in his bowl, which i kept aside now. Can I do something or do i have to call the pest control? I live in Auckland, New Zealand, is pest control expensive?I found a rat in the tiny room dat i keep my dog's kennel in, we hav never had this problem! pls advice!?
    There is a product that is sold which comes in like a green looking solid bar...you break off pieces %26amp; place in areas [hidden from other critters or kids]...the rats will eat it %26amp; the chemical in the stuff actually kills the rat from inside out...no dead rats laying around or smell! IF you are interested in just using a deterrent then place cotton balls dipped in peppermint oil near problem areas...also using kitty litter can be a repellent. Good luck!I found a rat in the tiny room dat i keep my dog's kennel in, we hav never had this problem! pls advice!?
    try getting a cat as a temporary pet until it eats the whole problem... believe me, a cat will definitively end up your troubles.
    remove the rat(trap) clean the room %26amp; dont leave food around to attract rat's %26amp; mice just feed the dog then remove it's dish


    ---no food no rats--
    Pest control may cost XXXX amount what ever it may be... Instead of that try out by keeping a rat at your place it would not cost you any thing. ( Borrow it from a friend)
    It's probably drawn to the dogs food supply.


    Keep his food picked up after he's done. Keep the supply in a rat proof container like a small metal trash can with a tight lid. Take expanding foam (in a spraycan) and fill the gaps that might come into the room (especially look behind the washer dryer, and around plumbing.)


    Put a trap out but make sure the dog can't get near it. Make sure to wash the floors and kennel if you think the rat was there. The droppings carry disease.

    I need some advice, roommate/friends problem?

    This might be long, but I need some advice on what I should do with this situation.





    I've been letting my best friend's bf stay with me. I wanted to help him but now I think he is scum.





    A couple months ago he crashed my friends car (he had been drinking and has no license) She took the fall for it so now her insurance paid for his surgery, and his wages for missing work.





    He got in trouble for driving without a license earlier in the year, and for something else so he is trying to get house arrest for those things. (house arrest at my place) But now Idk if want him there. I didn't realize that he was going to get money for missing work, so before I didn't ask for rent or help with pud/internet, but now I know he has money, and I'm irritated that he didn't offer to give me some, especially since I hooked up home phone service for his house arrest monitor! (I normally just use my cell cause I didn't need an extra bill)





    Also his friend mentioned to me that he is addicted to pills, and because of his surgery hes been on pills for two month and now he doesn't have any so I think that's why he's had a piss poor attitude, I'm guessing withdrawals. Plus the other day he brought this total creeper up to my apartment with him! I told him if he was going to do that stuff that he needed to do it away from the apartment! I'm convinced that he is an addict and was buying pills.





    His terrible moods are whats pissing me off the most. He should be grateful. His *** should be in prison for all the **** hes done! But he has it the easiest, he gets an EBT card for food, he is getting paid without having to work, he got that surgery paid for, and he lives at my place for free.. I don't get how someone lives like that... I don't understand how he can mop around with this terrible attitude when his life is sooo easy! Pisses me off, and even more so because he is mean to my friend and I hate seeing her hurting. So yea.. now I don't what to do. :( If I decided to kick him out how should I go about it? I don't want to upset my friend by kicking her bf out.. Idk what I would say.





    Advice? Comments? Suggestions?I need some advice, roommate/friends problem?
    kick his a$$ out of your place and have your friend not pay is bills anymore. take him to court and sue him for all the damages and suffering he has ccause you!!I need some advice, roommate/friends problem?
    UHMM %26gt;_%26gt; u should be SERIOUSLY concerned about your valueables turning up missing. Personally I would suggest that you ask him to pay for that home service phone that he is using, and make rules like no company he has no right to bring creepy people over to your house when he doesnt pay bills there. And u should look into putting him out u should not t olerate an addict ion your house who has taken advantage of your friend and you. If u feel ackward telling him to leave *i can understand that* tell his girlfriend your friend to tell him to go orr u can pretend that u are struggling financially and u want to get a roomate which would be a very cute excuse to boot him out , and then later just be like you decide dnot to go through with getting a roommte lol
    Ok! Hi, My name is Stasia and I think that you should kick his bum a** out of your home, But first kill him with kindness ask him since he's staying here with you can he help around the house like pick up on some bills since your not living there alone you shouldn't be stuck wit all the bills..... If he doesn't want to do that then ask him if he can at least pay you weekly or monthly some rent to put towards the bills and rent and if he doesn't want to live by your rules ask the guy as nice as possible to leave your home, because he's making it harder for you to survive. Tell your best friend that you love her but you can't keep living like this and if she wants him not to leave than she has to clean up after him, have some money every month to contribute to the bills or something because no one can live any where for free.... I hope I helped you out a lil bit wit my advice see i'm rude so tried to put that the nicest way possible........ Good luck!!!!!!!!!!

    Please help, adult advice on teenage problem? :(?

    hi, alright so this is the story:


    im 16 years old, junior in highschol, gets good grades, and still a virgin, most of my friends arent virgins and they always make fun of me for being a virgin but dont worry, i dont get fooled. i WANT to wait til marriage and i WILL wait till marriage regards to whatever they say.


    couple days ago, as a joke, my friend (as a joke) typed this funny ';contract';that says ';I, (MY NAME) WILL LOSE MY VIRGINTY'; when i sign that i agreed to lose my virginity before senior year, we all laughed about it (i dont take it personally) and they all faked my signature on it and so on.. so after all the laughing and joking around, like friends do, i kept the piece of paper with me so no one would find it, i put it in my purse so id throw it away at home, but i seemed to forgot and my mom (behind my back) looked through my purse and found that paper. now, i have two older sisters (18 and 20) and they both live with us and she showed them it. so when i came home after school, i walked in the door, my 18 yr old sister calls me a **** and gives me a dirty looks, i didnt think anything of it as we dont get along, so i just went upstairs to my room and my 20 yr old sister opens my door and calls me a whore. and leaves. then my mom comes in, and she told me she found this in my purse (the contract) i decided to tell her the truth that all kids tease me and it was just a joke between my friends and she should know better that i wont do that.


    but the thing that hurt me the most was that she showed two of my sisters (there planning on telling my dad) before she confronted me. i never had a good relationship with my mom or sisters because im just different, im more mellow and easy going and gets along with anyone, while there full of drama and are the biggest racist people you will ever meet.


    im really sorry if this is long, but i dont have anyone to talk to, and there is no way i will ever talk to my mom about anything again as it seems that i cant trust her :/ help. is it my fault? what do i do?Please help, adult advice on teenage problem? :(?
    No, it's not your fault. Your Mom has trust issues for sure as she went through your purse behind your back. Plus she told your sisters about it before talking to you. I can understand her being upset when she found it, I have three daughters and would have freaked out also, but I would never have gone in your purse. If she thought you were doing drugs, or something else, she may have done this for a reason, but you say, you haven't given her a reason to distrust you. Evidently, your family has some problems. You do have someone to speak to, it's your school counselor. Go immediately and ask to speak with him or her and tell this story. They will help you. Also, there are clergy men and women who will help you when you explain this to them. Do you have a trusted aunt or uncle who could talk to your Mom and Dad and sisters about this distrust problem? Never feel there is no one to speak with, because there always is that counselor. School counselors are trained to handle this kind of family problem. Good luck - I'll say a prayer for you.Please help, adult advice on teenage problem? :(?
    Aww that sucks.


    It'll definately pass with time you just need to let it go and


    if you want you can talk to her more about it. Tell your sisters to stop being such twats.


    You sound like you're better than them.
    oh wow this is kinda hard to answer, all you can do is say my ways arent worse then urs, and just keep telling them the truth and stuff, and tell one of ur closest freinds who was there to tell ur mom / sisters what really happened
    No, it's not your fault that your family isn't as understanding and supportive as you'd like them to be. You can email me and talk to me anytime. I'll listen. Good luck :)
    You need to get some new friends. The friends you have now are not really your friends or they would have never done something so rude to you.
    Yes it is your fault.


    Don't allow your friends to play such dirty tricks with you. There should be always a red line they shouldn't cross.
    well atleast it was a good read, lol





    at the end of the day you aint done nothing wrong, your surrounded by idiots tho.
    come open your body is a temple and has close doors so dont open it to some dumby butt ok
    It isn't yore fault. You have a hard family, just that
    Don't let it get to you. It is not your fault. My family is the same way, just ignore them.
    fyi **** isnt a bad word! haha lol
    Oh my ??
    okay first off you should of through it away at school and you should ignore your sisters and mom they have no right to call you that but dont let them bring you down because you no u not one im 17 im stilll a virgin and im waiting till marriage=] dont kill yourself thats not going solve anything try talking to a counselor i do or you can message me on myspace shaquisha_010@yahoo.com
    It's no ones ';fault'; in my opinion. You could have remembered to ditch the note ... or your mom could have not pawed through your purse ... or your sisters could have had more faith in you. But none of those things happened. So it's water under the bridge.





    What I would suggest is to go to your dad before the sister act can and tell him the whole story. I expect he'll recognize the behavior.





    So far as your mother is concerned, maybe you can ask a friend over after school one day and have the friend explain the whole thing to her. Although, if she doesn't believe you she probably won't believe your friend.





    Plan B would be to just drop the whole thing and hope they will, too. You know in your heart what the truth is. There's no real need to get yourself all worked up just because they don't know the truth and are seemingly determined not to know it.





    Be your same self. Be as friendly as you can be, don't upset the household apple cart and go on as best you can. Good luck to you, and I'm sorry you've found yourself in this situation.
    first id like to say good job...im waiting for the right person as well! Now in terms of that incident...id say you should confront your mom and tell her that your very angry at her for going through your purse without your permission and how it wasnt right for her to do that and on top of that, ask her why she had to open her big mouth and tell your (sounds like 2 complete b*tches if you ask me) rude b*tchy sisters before speaking to you. And once again explain to her that it was an inside joke between you and your friends and she has no right to assume the worse. Then tell your sisters off and be like do you really think im you...ok dont call me a whore when you and blah blah blah...my god i hate your sisters and i dont even know them! %26gt;:(
    I'm really sorry about what happened. You should not be ashamed that your still a virgin. Your whole family kind of sounds mean and I'm really sorry. This is not your fault at all. I don't really know what you can do but if you need someone to talk to I'm here for you. And I know what its like when there is no one to talk to. I would talk to your friends.
    it seems you are being treated unfairly and your sisters at that age should grow up and act their age. I think you need to rise above them, let them know how you see things and tell your mon your unhappy with things as they are,


    If you believe you are not at fault and your being mistreated make a stand - tell your sisters to mind their own business and grow up.
    That's an invasion with privacy.





    YOur mom is mental and is not being a good parent.





    It's hard to trust a parent once they've proven untrustworthy, ditto with their children.





    Right now, I guess, just continue proving you're trustworthy, and from experienced, it took me all my life, until mom died. Yes, I'm more trustworthy than my sister, but parents have a problem believing that because of their insecurities. They're just human.





    A bonus for your wanting to remain virgin, until marriage, don't be pressured to something you're not ready for.
    next time rip up incriminating evidence and dispose of it were you are and im sorry that really sucks and is very very low of them i would suggest you talk to your dad quickly and get it over with and suggest family conseling ...good chance to embarrass them for stepping out of line...gl hun
    First of all, be mindful of the situation you have with your Mom and sisters. I am sure that if you had thought of it, you would have thrown the paper away before you got home.





    Now, you are going to have to take this as a tremendous learning and maturation experience which will ultimately make you a far stronger, more intelligent, and successful person than they are because you need to rise above it.





    Take a hard look at your present environment....every aspect...school, home, everything...and figure out what needs to change...and change it. Even though you may not like it, it is time for you to change.





    You are too young to leave your home, and you should respect your Mom (regardless of your feeling about her), so take this time to prepare yourself for adulthood...which in this case means getting good enough grades to earn grant and scholarship money to go away to college on your own where you will prepare yourself for a successful life.





    I really wish I could tell you something more positive, but this is a reality check and it happens to everyone at some point in their life...including me.





    You may email me if you have to.





    Good Luck
    first


    i am glad that you are who you are


    and i am gld that you know what you want for the future.





    well i know kids in school tend to be idiots i would say and inmature.


    i have to say they don't know s#it





    well you did right to take the later away.


    the only mistake you did.


    is this one you didn't destroy the paper.





    once your mother found this.


    probably she didn't know what to do and freaked out.


    that is why she went to your sisters thinking that probably


    they could give her a better answer on how to deal with this problem.





    i know how girls at.


    and sorry if i offend you.


    but most likely when it comes to this type of problems.


    females do not know what to do.





    do not feel bad.


    i have to have to say your sisters


    are inmature.





    the first thing they should it done is


    talk to you.


    no call you a bitc#





    well just get a couple of friend of yours the person that actually wrote the note. and take him/her home.


    it has to be in a day when only mom and you are home.


    so you could have a really private conversation ok.


    make sure your sisters are not there.


    and make sure your mom does not get mad at the person that is


    telling her the truth. ok





    let her know it was a joke.


    we didn't ment to offend your daughter.





    make sure someone talks to mom





    ok


    good luck


    hope this help
    no of corse its not you fault. time will pass and they will forget about it :)





    and as for you 'friends' .. guys prefer virgins! as they no they havnt been round the block. and they also think that virgins have a tighter vagina so it will feel better in sex than sumbody that had lots of sex and is all loose :)
    Well, Stella my love, I'm very proud of you for your convictions. Your mom should be more proud of you as well. You are doing a good job of resisting peer pressure. Real friends would be supportive of your ideals and not want you to do anything that was unsafe, illegal or against your moral principals. What others think of you will not change the truth. I have a feeling that some of your friends may only pretending to have lost their virginity. I don't know why as it's nothing to be proud of.

    Help i need advice about this problem i got here?

    I just turned 18, and i never had a gf due to because i was really fat but im now in shape for sum reason girls like me now. So anyways i met a girl who is 22 and she has a 2 year old girl, and is currenlty divorced but the babys dad still comes to visit the daughter...


    (I don't want baby daddy problems).......





    Anyways i lied to her i said i was 20, and now we are hitting off Should i stop seeing her, or just flow with it and have fun and enjoy my young life???Help i need advice about this problem i got here?
    You need to tell her the truth... if you guys start to really become good friends, she may or may not be liking you for the wrong reasons... you don't want a LIE to be holding ur relationship together, do you? If she actually likes you for you and not your age, she will probably understand.Help i need advice about this problem i got here?
    Relationships get really complicated when a child is involved. If you do not truly want a serious relationship with her I wouldn't bother. Its not fair to her daughter. Children get attached very easily. Its hard for them to have people go in and out of their lives. Its not going to be like dating every other girl. She is different she is responsible for another life and you have to remember that. She is not going to be able to put you first in her life. If you truly like her you should tell her the truth about your age. I promise it will come out sooner or later. Better now before you get attached. A relationship will never work based on a lie.





    I really hope I helped and you make the right decision, Good luck and I think its great you are interested in her despite the fact she has a child. Most guys run the other way. So good for you!!