Any advice on this problem I have? This is long, so those who are willing to read and answer, thank you!?

Things you should know:





Ballet teacher 1: Let’s call her Sally. Sally is my ballet teacher and is the founder and basically runs the ballet school.


Ballet teacher 2: Let’s call her Katie. Katie is a college student and also a ballet teacher and works for Sally. I don’t like her very much due to an event that happened in the past (long story…but she was angry with me for something beyond my control) She didn’t handle it like an adult should have, instead she just yelled at me in public and made a scene, not caring to listen to what I had to say in my defense…but yeah because of that I am not too fond of her. Another reason why I dislike her is because she thinks and acts like she owns the place, not to mention she can be really rude to Sally sometimes.





Ok, here’s my story.





I take ballet during the week and on Saturdays. Those Saturdays I work for Sally, my ballet teacher, as her personal secretary and then go to class after 2 hours of work. I do this so that I can get a discount since the cost of the lessons is really high. Anyways, last Thursday there was some commotion about rehearsals for the upcoming Nutcracker. My ballet teacher, Sally, asked me if I could come in Saturday after class and do rehearsal. (note: she said Saturday, not NEXT Saturday) Because of this I assume that she means this coming Saturday, and I know that I’m not going to be there that day AT ALL, not for work or class. I tell her I can’t do it because (I state my reason) and I won’t be there Saturday, AT ALL. I thought that everything was going to be fine now that she knew I wasn’t going to be there. I was wrong. I get an angry phone call today from the other ballet teacher, Katie. She begins to speak to me in a very condescending tone. She asks me why I am not at the studio working, and why I didn’t call. I told her that I told Sally I wasn’t going to be there. With my rotten luck Sally doesn’t remember me telling her this, and denies me telling her. Sally is very forgetful (like forgetting what time a class ended…she ended up letting them out 1 hour early). Anyways, Katie knows that Sally is scatterbrained, but of course doesn’t believe me that I told Sally and lectures me over the phone. She then says I need to call HER the next time I’m not going to be there. My first thought is, “hmm…that’s funny…I DON’T WORK FOR YOU!” In my mind the person who I think I should call about stuff like this would be Sally, because 1. She is basically the person in charge, 2. She is my ballet teacher not Katie, and 3. Sally gave me this job in the first place not Katie. I can understand Katie being an authority figure because she’s older but I don’t WORK for HER. As a matter of fact, I work WITH her not FOR her. Katie not only is a ballet teacher but also does secretary work for Sally like I do. I don’t mind her asking me to do things, but I do care if she asks me to do stuff and is rude about it, which is how she is most of the time. I believe Katie thinks of me as another rebellious teenager who’s an idiot. But in reality I am just as rebellious as a cotton ball and I am definitely not an idiot. So now I am frustrated and angry because once again I’m the one who supposedly screwed up. Fantastic…





Sorry this is so long, but I had to rant a bit due to the fact I am so irritated by this unfair accusation. Advice on how to cope with this issue and other words of wisdom are very much appreciated! Thanks!


Any advice on this problem I have? This is long, so those who are willing to read and answer, thank you!?
Oh, gosh, I hate it when stuff like this happens. Nothing is more frustrating than the feeling that you were misunderstood or misjudged.


Based on the information you gave, it sounds like you did all the right things. Misunderstandings happen like this even though you did nothing wrong. The important thing is to have confidence in yourself - when you appear confident, that shows them you stand strong in regard to whatever the conflict happens to be. You don't even have to feel confident, just play the part and you will look confident!


You are absolutely right that you should only have to answer to Sally and not Katie.


You did not mention if Sally was angry or not; if she was, then she will get over it, first and foremost. Also, I would hope that Sally knows YOU and knows your work ethic well enough to know that not showing up is not in your character, and that mistakes can and do happen. Also, when conflicts like these happen, people are much more forgiving when they know that the intent behind the behavior was not meant to cause harm or chaos.


Another possible solution to the problem may be to do something in writing if possible, so you have something to back up your word with. (Like a monthly schedule...?) Sally also carries part of the responsibility in her position that she keeps up with everything that is happening in the studio.


I hope this helps, and they will get over it. It sounds like Katie has some other issues or problems and is taking it out on others. Stand up for yourself and she will more than likely not do that to you.


Remember that we teach others how to treat us by the way we treat ourselves, so make sure you take care of you and the rest will fall into place. :)


Hope this helps! Any advice on this problem I have? This is long, so those who are willing to read and answer, thank you!?
ok so i think that you should write things down, so that when sally is asked, she can produce the note. that way there is no question that you did something. second, is yes, katie is a control freak, and she feels she can run the situation. she must not feel very important because, she, after all, is not the boss. so next time she feels she can boss you around, just say something underlying sally is ur boss. like , im sorry, but my BOSS, told me other wise. , or i told my BOSS about that. maybe she will get the hint then. dont treat her with disrespect or anything, because that would give her a reason to tattle on you about something. another thing is be nice to her and the exact oppisite she is to you. when she realizes she isnt getting a reaction from you, then she will get annoyed and stop. show no emotion . let what ever she says to you when she is yelling roll off you, and just smile at her and say , i understand.she will be confused as to why your not responding to her. and when she does yell, maybe dropping silent hints, to her would be good too. i really hope i helped you, i had the same problem where i worked too.